Read Emi Gusukuma's tribute to Kayo here:http://www.powerpac.org
Gee Phil, you seem pretty down."...#3. And to add, my experience is that of all four white girls who ever expressed any interest in me at all, ever, and didn't become soon after uninterested..."If they had a fetish, why would they then become uninterested? How do you distinguish an 'attraction' from a 'fetish'? Isn't a 'fetish' something where the person is 'objectified' such that they lose any real 'identity' other than as the 'thing' of the fetish? i.e. - any 'asian guy' will do, not a specific asian guy."...What do these girls assume they will find that attracts them? ... and my suspicion leads me to think they have inaccurate assumptions about what they're going to get."As they have dated asian guys before, it would seem they actually found what attracts them. What do you think they would 'get' universally from 'asian guys' that they can't or won't get from other guys?"I wonder ..."Good questions. What's your experience?"Good question; I wouldn't know ..."Bad answer. The question was not 'what is your experience with...' but 'why don't you try to date...'. Your lack of success in this area could be due to many factors - not trying would be a leading one. Why haven't you tried?"...I've found myself attracted to women of all sorts (desperation?)..." Nope. Human.I *do* seem to have a preference for "white" women however, and even moreover, European women (?)"I form my identity less by my ancestry however, neither Asian nor American really, but more out of just "human"...."It doesn't complicate it, but I suggest that it is somewhat impossible. Your preference for *European* women would be impossible to identify without some corresponding descriptor to compare them against. You must have an idea of 'non-European' to compare to 'European' so that you can 'name' your preference."I vote no on the "having fear of rejection"; at this point, I expect rejection, from her or me."Could it be that this self-defeating attitude manifests itself and leads to the inevitable rejection? A little Dr. Phil-ish, but..."Wow, this is relative to individual values and is tough to generalize..."You stated a preference for 'white' and/or European, so apparantly it is not so difficult to 'pin' on a person. Actually, I would contend that Canadians, British\UK or Americans cannot be automatically catagorized or assumed to be white. This is one of the 'problems' in my opinion.'Europeans' do not have a monlithic culture. Is it the 'culture' you like or their ethnicity? Would an ethnically Aborigine woman born, raised and acculturated in Stockholm satisfy you? She would be 'European' in culture, but not ethnically."Depends on the social hierarchy. There are those who think that dating a white guy / girl is dating down...aren't there?"True, but this thread was looking at it the other way."This is a GREAT point, and more reason for me to be to just be more sorrowful than bitter; ... me and white women are not made to be ... but I've also mostly dreamed about white women; I am doomed."And overly melodramatic."..It would be good to know the reason why they date other non-whites, I guess."Could it be because they like the person? Maybe they (those white women that date non-whites) are NOT equating their partner to a 'trophy' or symbol which they must 'acquire' to be happy.Maybe they think he will be good in bed, treat her nicely, has a rich uncle."I'm bitter. But more sad, because I've generally given up."Cheezz'n Crackers! You're 25!!! give the 'sad sack' thing a rest."And thankful to all of you, as I am rarely involved in Asian American culture, and this is really my only way to hear other people's perspectives, outside of social cliques and group-think."Why can't you 'engage' with other persons or groups? Do you live somewhere that has no 'minorities' at all?
They said it! You go, um...men! :-o#3. And to add, my experience is that of all four white girls who ever expressed any interest in me at all, ever, and didn't become soon after uninterested, well I don't know how to otherwise say it, they had some kind of Asian *male* fetish...what's up with that??? Although I can't be completely certain to state "fetish", both had had histories of dating other Asian men. What do these girls assume they will find that attracts them? I actually find myself generally disgusted by this idea because I don't understand it, and my suspicion leads me to think they have inaccurate assumptions about what they're going to get. I wonder how much social relationships between Asian men and others all divides down between the different kinds of Asians as well as the mixes between Asians and Asian Americans. Would a Korean-American girl "accept" a Vietnamese-American guy? I wonder how the dynamic differs from areas where Asian Americans are (more / less) (assimilated / accepted) on (East Coast / Midwest / West Coast)? Maybe it matters less or works differently? And in Canada??? >i have a bone to pick with bitter asian men. why aren't they trying to date latinasGood question; I wouldn't know as I've basically had no experience in relationships, and I'm single as ever, at 25 years old. (Bitter?) However, I can say that I've found myself attracted to women of all sorts (desperation?) and although the majority of those would fall under "white American," I cannot recall specifically having rejected someone else's interest due to their ethnicity or color or ancestry, etc (yep, desperate). Although as before, considering the few number of women who have ever expressed any interest...my statistics are useless. I *do* seem to have a preference for "white" women however, and even moreover, European women (?) I form my identity less by my ancestry however, neither Asian nor American really, but more out of just "human". I wonder if some of this complicates the whole issue? I am hoping there are others out there who can see past the color / ancestry / etc. thing? >i think there are a few reasons why it's hard for asian guys to approach other races. I vote no on the "having fear of rejection"; at this point, I expect rejection, from her or me. >i think one is that being with a caucasian (male or female) is seen as the gold Wow, this is relative to individual values and is tough to generalize, isn't it? I don't see caucasian as a standard...at least I don't think I do. I'd like to meet maybe a cute Dutch, Swedish, German, British, Irish, Canadian, American, or Asian or...yeah--are those people all seen as "white" (disregarding American and Asian of course, although some would make the case as well on the latter)? I'd say Europeans have a very different culture, of course, and I think this affects the dynamic. >an asian guy when you can date a white guy? why date down in the social hierarchy? Depends on the social hierarchy. There are those who think that dating a white guy / girl is dating down...aren't there? >but we're not the guy they've dreamed about all their lives. This is a GREAT point, and more reason for me to be to just be more sorrowful than bitter; I agree. I guess me and white women are not made to be, if people see color or physical attributes as primary factors. I am open, but I've also mostly dreamed about white women; I am doomed. Overall, it's tough trying to make guesses as to what others think, but I'd love to know, as I'm sure so many others would. >white women date other non-whites, so why wouldn't they date asian guys too?It would be good to know the reason why they date other non-whites, I guess. >or does it?"White" is neither a step up nor down for me--stepping down means accepting ill manners and behavior, however, regardless of physical characteristics. I'm bitter. But more sad, because I've generally given up. And thankful to all of you, as I am rarely involved in Asian American culture, and this is really my only way to hear other people's perspectives, outside of social cliques and group-think.
It's actually in the contract. The military can retain any or all of us beyond the dates of the contract for teh duration +6 months of any war or declared national emergency.When stop loss is in effect, soldiers in units that have been placed on alert for deployment may not End Term of Service (ETS) or retire (unless for attaing maximum military age: 60) until either the unit is stood down from alert or 90 days after redeploying (returning home).At whichever end point, all troops hat would have ETSd or retired will do so.Nothing sinister in this. It is done soley to stabilize manpower rosters for deployment.Also, once a troop has reached 12 months from the date he was supposed to separate from the service, he can choose to do so.It's not nearly as draconian as it's been made out to be.
precision blogger: could you please post your url (rather than the hyperlink)? the link isn't working for me. thanks!
kudos again to claire for targetting important information which pertians to us all. thanks!
hmmm, it seems that maybe you have set white women as the gold standard too. maybe i am leaping to conclusions, but it sounds like you have not considered dating a non-asian girl who is also non-white. as for white women not dating asian guys because of a 'why take a step back' mentality, white women date other non-whites, so why wouldn't they date asian guys too? it sounds like you would consider any of them (non-white and non-asian guys) as a 'step back' for her.as for fear of rejection, does this fear on their part make them any more compassionate when someone comes up to them? or do they kick 'em to the curb with no remorse and no attempt at getting to know the person? mighty mighty props to claire at the start of this thread on telling asian guys that they had better check themselves before they kevitch about getting dissed on account of their being asian. karma is a hard teacher.you are correct on the social circles thing - where and who you hang out with is a big factor. if you cocoon yourself in a limited range universe, don't be surprised if your sky has few stars.on the asian girls and the 'moving on up' thing, where do they get that from and why does it not 'affect' their brothers when they are growing up too? or does it? don't think of people as merit badges you need to collect to gain entry to the next level. it demeans them and demeans you even more. plus, why would you want to aspire to join a group that (presumably) didn't want you in the first place?i think it is real important that non-whites in the US (and the world) stop stop STOP allowing or accepting the premise that 'white' is the normative condition and that all others (theirs) are somehow less than normal. this is not said to diminsh white people but to recognize and acknowledge that all people are people and as people deserve a universal level of respect and dignity and that their histories, cultures and lives are just as valuable as anyone elses. please do not begin a round of 'Kumbiya' and hold hands! just treat me like you would like to be treated (unless you are a masochist since i am not!) and we are cool. deal with me as me and not as your preconceived notion of WTF based on some stupid unreal reality show or your limited exposure to a narrow sampling of manufactured MacCulture - predigested for your convenience.so i suggest to the libertinea...Go get 'em tiger!!! and don't forget to ask her if fries come with that shake?
Actually, in China nudity is no longer a taboo. Did anybody else read the Leslie Chang (Wall Street Journal's Beijing Bureau Chief) article on nude photo portraits in Shanghai? Apparently they were all the rage in Shanghai a few years ago. Even in the early 1990s when I lived in the PRC, full nudity of Chinese women was rampant. Even male performance artists in China have been using nudity in their work for decades. This whole spiel that in China nudity is not acceptable is not true. It's a stereotype. Perhaps she's thinking back to the days when she lived in China, but in contemporary China, Playboy is alas a huge presence. Methinks this talk is an attempt to flatter the West ("Oh, look how advanced we are!"). Ha!
i think there are a few reasons why it's hard for asian guys to approach other races. i would say fear of rejection is a huge reason, but there are other factors that are out of control.i think one is that being with a caucasian (male or female) is seen as the gold standard. it's like you're moving up in the world. if you're an asian girl, being with a white guy somehow validates your being accepted as an american or whatever. for white girls, why date an asian guy when you can date a white guy? why date down in the social hierarchy?this goes along with the previous reason, and it's that most white women just don't consider asian guys as possible companions. we can be great friends cause we're studious and nice, basically harmless guys. but we're not the guy they've dreamed about all their lives. we're not brad pitt or whoever. i'm not saying this is racism or anything...in fact i think it's innocent and inadvertent, but it happens nonetheless.i also think there are stereotypes about asian guys. i mean it's what asian guys bitch about all the time, which is lame, but i don't think it's groundless whining. i think it sort of creates an inferiority complex.i've been with two non asian girls and in neither case was i the one that made the approach. i think with most things it comes down to social circles and where you hang out. i mean walking up to a bombshell in a bar doesn't work for teh hottest white guy, i wouldnt expect it to work for an asian guy. but if you're around a girl a lot and she gets to know you as a person besides just being an asian guy, i think with most open minded girls you've got as good a shot as anyone.rant over
Thanks. I think they must be attracted to the smell of my cleaning products, which are kind of fruity-smelling. I tried the vinegar trick and they're not around anymore. I also tried leaving them some instant grits outside -- a website said they would eat them and die from dehydration. But they've passed the grits up.
I think it may have closed already? I noticed it's nowhere on the sony picture classics website anymore.
When will this open in Honolulu? With our large Asian/Pacific population, this film should do well here.
'preference' notwithstanding, is it just a 'fear of rejection' or is it really a disdain for those perceived as 'less worthy'? this doesn't seem to be only an asian guy problem. if you look at the overwhelming majority of 'mixed' couples, it is asian women and white men. i don't think the white men are hypnotizing the asian women so what gives?also, i don't see many waving the 'preference banner' in defense of those white guys that 'prefer' asian women so is it a real justification now? what if white girls said they 'prefer' white men? would that go down as easily as the 'preference' defense posted above?
ridiculous..delgado shouldn't be hired
he has plenty of money, writing inappropriate songs to gain national press is not acceptable
one of guys says that "unfortunely he prefers asian girls". oh well..
I do agree with Claire. I have Asian friends who are too afraid of rejection that they never try asking girls of other races... then they turn around and complain about the girls.
The President of Galaxy and his attorney have been writing letters threatening legal action to protesters.Don't be intimidated.Sponsors:firstname.lastname@example.org@homedepot.comProgram director:email@example.comPresident and CEO:firstname.lastname@example.org
what's with the panda logo on the bitter asian men site? it looks like it's menstruating or something, pms panda.
On a similar note... I happened to see the pilot for an upcoming show on ABC called "Emily's Reasons Why Not." This show features an asian woman named 'Glitter' played by Smith Cho. Guess what? Cho plays a nasty but oh-so-sexy bitch.How novel.
i have a bone to pick with bitter asian men. why aren't they trying to date latinas, or african americans, or arabs, or native americans, or ... ? if you're gonna complain about being discriminated against because of your race, you better be correct yourself!
try wiping all of the srufaces the ants are on with vinegar every day until they're gone. it took me 3 days to be rid of the ones in my home.
Does anyone know how/where to get a hold of decent videorecordings of Asian American plays? I'm looking for some of the seminal ones: Chickencoop Chinaman, Yankee Dawg You Die, Tea, etc., etc.
The previous issue of Hyphen is available in its entirety for your perusing pleasure. Almost as good as having it right in your hands!