Passion! Betrayal! Ketchup! Electoral Fraud!

November 2, 2004

I once dated a guy who, at age 26, had never voted.

We only had 2 dates.

Not voting is just not sexy. And this year, that is more true than ever. Voting has become part of one's cultural wardrobe, a necessity for social commerce. People who don't vote are like people who don't have TV --they could be good people, they have their reasons, but they're out of it. They don't know who Bart Simpson is or why Ashlee Simpson is the laughing stock of the nation.

But really, this election has something for everyone. First off, suspense could not be greater. The stakes are high --not just the title of leader of the free world, but a war, billions of dollars worth of oil, and many men's egos are on the line. The too-close-to call polls make the election returns a must-watch television event. And the near-certainty of lawsuits contesting the validity of vote --How will the Supreme Court rule with Rehnquist sick and all? --just make it all the more unpredictable.

Then there's the dirty tricks, insidious and clever machinations to manipulate the vote. We all know about D85P14DO0 [at]">Jeb Bush purging voter rolls, but how about that electronic voting booth that got stuck on the GOP page(reported on KPFA)? How about those Republican challengers sent to harrass people of color at the polls in Ohio? How about that unknown Milwaukeean, who slashed the tires of 30 Republican get-out-the-vote vans? This stuff has the makings of an Aaron Spelling hit.

For Nascar dad types, who watch the World Wresting Federation, check out the low blows and dirty tricks of the 527s, who by campaign finance law are only allowed to say negative things about the other guy. Swift Boat vets and, need I say more?

For people who enjoy the lighter side, who doesn't enjoy seeing Bush flipping off the camera? Or reading bumper sticker slogans at
and learning why they're different from And even I had to laugh when an ad for "W Ketchup" showed up on Hyphen's website via google ads.

I don't remember a time when an election has been more anticipated, when excitement and participation was so frenzied. Reality TV has nothing on the unscripted plot twists, high emotions and dirty dealings of the presidential election.

I can't wait to see what happens.

Go out and vote, already!