The US Pan Asian American Chamber of Conference held the largest national business conference for AAs at the beginning of May. Guess what they called it? CelebrAsian 2005! This may not be the first or last time I'll complain about this, but people! Come on! Making -tion and -cion words into "blahblahAsian" is NOT clever! Not original! Not funny! In fact, I'll go so far as to say it makes us Asians look like big loser dorks. ImaginAsian? InnovAsian? Think a little harder please! Anyway, Elaine Chao, Secretary of Labor, was one of the speakers at the conference. Chao was recently honored by the National Ethnic Coalition of Organizations (NECO) Inc, who presented her with Ellis Island Medal of Honor in a ceremony on Ellis Island on May 14. The award is for "Americans of diverse origins for their outstanding contributions to their own ethnic groups and to American society." We've written a little about Chao in Hyphen because Chao has done all sorts of anti-labor, anti immigrant stuff and is seen by many in the AA community as Not A Help At All, a token, or Just a Little Less Bad than Condeleeza Rice. (Go here to see some reasons why.) But Hey! She's the first Asian American woman to hold a cabinet level post (Shame on you Democrats! How did you let the Republicans beat you at this!) and is thusly celebrated on Ellis Island, which she supposedly passed on her way to New York on a freighter at age 8. Other great things about CelebrAsian? "The Corporation of the Year and Government Agency of the Year awards were also given to Verizon and the U.S. Department of Interior, respectively." Government Agency of the Year? Now, why didn't we think of that! Hyphen should give out awards for like, Ambassador of the Year, Senator of the Year, (give you a hint: it won't be Bill Frist) Vice President of the Year (no award for the last 5 years) and State Department Undersecretary of the year. those guys are the unsung heroes, man. (Don't even get me started on Verizon, though. thanks to the lies told to me by their rep. they were trying to charge me an extra 80 bucks the other day. If you really want details email me.) But I shouldn't make fun of the chamber of commerce. The USPAACC works to diversify government contracts, awards scholarships, helps nurture entrepeneurs, recognizes talent in the community, and all around tries to promote Asian Americans in business. They could probably give Hyphen a pointer or two on, you know, business stuff. Just please, Chamber of Commerce Chairpeople, when you're giving us an award in 10 years, don't put "CelebrAsian 2015" on the trophy. (PS: I'm not as cocky of a bastard as I sound. really i'm not.)