Are You A Bitter Asian Man?

July 13, 2005

Hello. Very busy. Going out of town for work. But thought I'd leave you with these fine links:

It was only a matter of time before there would be a site like this: Bitter Asian Men Why are they so bitter? Cause white girls AND asian girls won't date them. Probably doesn't help when Jackie Chan says white guys should marry Chinese women in order to spread Chinese culture. Huh? Wow, that is whack.
Bitter Asian Men, I want you to know there are Asian women out there who date Asian men. I don't know what's up with Asian women who won't date Asian men. Hey, it's their loss. More Asian men for me!

Here's a cover story on Tom Shimura (you may know him as rapper Lyrics Born) in the East Bay Express.

And Asian kids, stop emailing Andrew Lam to ask him to help with your homework about his short stories. Lam ruminates on the cultural reasons they're writing in. An excerpt: "I find it curious that many Asian American entrants, even those with a perfect command of English, don't use the first- person narrative. The word "I" doesn't appear on the page, leaving writers to struggle with the awkward "one," even when addressing issues within their own families."

Contributor: 

Melissa Hung

Founding Editor

Melissa Hung is the founding editor of Hyphen. She was the editor in chief for the magazine's first five years and went on to serve in many other leadership roles on the staff and board for more than a decade. She is a writer and freelance journalist. Her essays and reported stories have appeared in NPR, Vogue, Pacific Standard, Longreads, and Catapult, among others. She grew up in Texas, the eldest child of immigrants. Find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Comments

Comments

To Aussie girl, if you want advice from younger Aussies instead of these silly yanks- I mean Americans :P- give this forum a go.http://community.boredofstudies.org/Its for Australian (but mainly NSW) high school/uni students.
Heya RELAX – sorry to have to do this to you buddie but you posted some misleading info in your last blog entry. There are only about 5% of Australia’s 18 million residents who are Asians (same as in America) – however Asians make up 40% of the annual immigration population. BUT if it makes you feel any better, according to some “projections”, 25% of Australia’s population in 2025 will be Asians. Thus perhaps Australia and America have more in common than what you initially thought?
i apologise for intruding upon this forum and causing some distraction!i am very interested by the opinions proposed here - i think that the fact "white women for the most part don't seem to like asian men" may stem from personal experiences, or the experiences of poeple they know. many relationships in which there is a mix of cultures, namely western/eastern, do not eventuate in a happily ever after ending (i know this is a very generalised comment). i have friends who are half asian half western, and whose parents are divorced. this may impact on people's views on relationships with someone of another culure.i think it has been previously mentioned that the differences in culture affect relationships? this is very true - one cannot completey break away from the culture he/she has grown up with, and you have to make allowances order to have a relationship with someone of a different culture. so in the case of "white" women, they may think that (like aussie girl does)the differences would be an obstacle in a relationship; it would be better not to bother. a real life example of cultural barriers is demonstrated in the biography of Cun Xi Li, in "mao's last Dancer". Li marries a western lady but it ends in divorce due to the cultural barrier. however he remarries again, to another westerner, later on in his life. (what do you make of this?...open ended question up for discussion)in the case of aussie girl, id like to know whether your guy has a girlfriend. obviously what happened "last year" was very special - otherwise you wouldn't be here talking about it still! perhaps, due to his hsc he feels that it's not the right time for a relationship...maybe until after the exams? and if he's surrounded by asians, it may be due to the fact that your school only has asians? it would be good to be direct and just ask him outright, but it would be awkward if you saw him again at school after a rejection. you're a bit unsure?...and of course there's always peer pressure...do not be afraid of people at your school not being able to understand the fact that a non asian is going out with an asian!
hello - does anyone else agree with me when i write:"relax and aussie girl" should exchange personal details? and continue from there?"u guys are having your own completely isolated discussion!
Interesting discussion. I am glad to read comments from other non-Asian women as well.Here are some comments based on my own experience.First of all, please read this interesting article on a white person's person experience with Asian male stereotypes.To the woman above who had a controlled boyfriend, well I just have to say there are many Asian men that don't do that. For me personally, I actually like strong woman and I married one. Yes it can get old sometimes when she tells what to do but it is also good that she can stand up for herself. BTW, I am Chinese American. Growing up, my mother always made us wash dishes and do house chores, so I never knew the perception that some Asian men are the head of the household. In my house, it seems like my mother was the head. Apparently, what's happening in my house is pretty common in many Chinese families where women run the house.Now onto dating experience. I have dated all kinds of women. Perhaps because I just ask girls out. It comes naturally to me. If I see a good looking girl, I just go ask her out.Here are some of my experiences:1) Most of the non-Asian women I dated I was their first Asian relationship.2) Most white girls told me they never knew Asian men were interested in them until I ask. Most Asian men just don't ask white girls out.3) Most Latino girls I have dated told me the same. They said it seems to them that when Asian men are into interracial relationships, it is only with white women.4) Many Asian women have told me that Asian men don't ask them out either. This could mean many things. It could mean some guys are just super picky. However, I think many Asian men just don't approach women.Yes I am well aware of stereotypes of Asian men in this country. We live in a society where white men dominated media places white men as the ultimate men for everyone. This is why media is always putting white men in leading roles and promote them as good husbands, lovers and everything else positive. When it comes to Asian men, it is the total opposite. I still remember the need to cringe every time I see an Asian man on the big screen. It is almost always negative. Also, it does not help when it comes to TV interracial relationships, the man in the relationship 90%+ of the time is white. You see, all women living in the USA are brainwashed by this. Many white and Asian women are brainwashed to believe this from the day they are born in the USA. This brainwashing might take a lot to overcome. However, some women do go out and experience things for themselves but many won't. This is the reality we have to live with.All my Ex non-Asian GFs have told me they would date another Asian guy if they had the chance. I guess I left somewhat positive experience for them even through some breakups were tough. The bottom line is Asian men need to ask girls out if they want to date (that include AFs too). Worst you get rejected and move one. I think I am a pretty decent looking guy and I have been rejected plenty of times. If you keep ask, you gonna get dates unless you r approach is so bad. I am living proof of that.
To lexor:I am grateful for your generousity - but I have a problem...I am not sure where I am suppose to look: I clicked on your link, but I am lost from there...please, I am curious of what it has to say, can you fill in the blanks? I assume you too are an Aussie: well thenFair dinkum mate
keiriruisu:6月に日本に来たら楽しんでいって下さい。enjoy yourself when you go to Japan in June. Let us all know how you trip goes when you leave. Tommorrow I will be leaving to conduct training for my company overseas. Ill be gone for a month. I took a week off, but its time to go to work. Im sure my presence will be missed on this site. Aussie Girl, you are just going to have to go for it. I wish you guys learn what the meaning "Yankee" before you use it. Just because you are American doesnt classify a person as a "yank". Theres a History behind it, so reasearch it. Well Goodbye, see you all in a few months
To Si.cJudging by the fact that you seem to know what the HSC means, I too am also going to assume that you are an Australian (please correct me if I am wrong). Concerning your question, NO he does not have a girlfriend – if he did I would not be attracted to him. I am the sort of girl that backs off once there is an official girl in his life: otherwise I would fell cheap, some-what second-hand like. I have also considered that maybe he does not want to pursue I relationship due to the pressures of the HSC, yet I believe that this is irrelevant. He is not a studious freak. He has a great social life. Thus there must be more to this than that.You should not need to apologise: I was the one who provoked the distraction, thus I should be the one apologizing. I will try in the future to stick to the initial discussion. You wrote: “i am very interested by the opinions proposed here - i think that the fact "white women for the most part don't seem to like asian men" may stem from personal experiences” – does this mean that you have experienced this? Would you care to elaborate, I am sure I speak for many others when I write that it would serve as a good purpose to hear a real life example of this. And yes, I am aware that there are half Asians – half Caucasians in the world, however these people are a small minority (but it does go to prove that a relationship between the two races is possible), however the comment you made about these relationships not lasting is quite true. In order for a relationship to function properly, there needs to be an understanding of your partners culture (this include religion), their culture has affected the way they perceive life, shaping their attitude and values – thus if you cannot master this then you are heading for failure. BUT Asian men need to understand that white women are willing to adjust, we are willing to embrace changes if that means it would strengthen the relationship. I for one am happy to do this. However I will expect the same from him. It must be a two-way thing. Underneath it all, Asians and ‘whites’ are the same, we are all human: if we can’t see past the differences on the outside and see the true similarity in the inside then there is no hope. All it would do would serve as a barrier, a barrier to what could have been the relationship of a lifetime.
If you're going to be a bunch of viciously bitter bastards, then you only have yourselves to blame. See, everything White people don't dig about Asian men, Asian women REALLY don't dig about Asian men. Only reason some Asian women seek to date a White man is because they feel more feminine than if they're with an Asian man. Stop being so damn bitter, and break the "bitter Asian male" stereotype already!
To RELAX:When I read your last blog, I felt empty. I have grown attached to you – I really enjoy reading your entries (even when they are not addressed to me), why can’t you use the net at work? I mean, I am sure you would still have access to the net…right?? I am positive that I write on behalf on many when I say that your presence would truly be missed. I hope you get this in time!! Good luck with your work…perhaps you would meet somebody special, somebody who is not an Asian? LOLWell I leave you to be.Thanks for your patience and your 'blunt' words hehe
To "Anonymous"No one is having their "own completely isolated discussion" - if you want to contribute to the discussion, there is no prevention. And as if I would post my personal details when imbeciles like you have access to it?
To lexor (provoked by RELAX):I've beena good 'school-girl' (that was for you RELAX) and done my homework LOLThe origin of Yankee is a nickname that dates back to the 1680s. Perhaps because it was used as the name of pirates, the name Yankee came to be used as a term of contempt. The British were the first to call the Americans Yankees (1780s) – around the same time it has been abbreviated to Yanks. During the American Revolution, American soldiers adopted this term of derision as a term of national pride. Now the term carries less emotion – except of course to baseball fans!!
"Alot of Asian guys just don't have any pride. You see alot of other men in other cultures try and out Alpha male each other, Asian guys dont even try. They just try to fit in."I vehemently disagree with this statement! I don't know about you, but all my male asian counterparts including myself possess an abundance of pride! And on top of that, because we have faced so much adversity in our lives due to discrimination, it makes us even stronger, it gives us the drive and ambition to be on top, to be the alpha male and change the status quo/hierarchy.Please do not make irresponsible statements like that. Not all of us are, as you infer, "weak".I grew up in a small town that is predominantly white. Everyday i was called a "chink". I resented every white person there and still do to some degree. But i realized that i would not be where i am today if i had not gone through that
Lexor and Aussie Girl:Well im packing to leave in about 6 hours, true, but not true. As you know there was a Civil War in America. The Union, against the Confederate States. The Mason Dixon Line seperated the North(Union) and the south(Confederates) from each other. The Southerners called the Union, or people North of the Mason Dixon Line Yankees. It use to be offnesive to call a southerner from the U. S. a Yankee, but I found out later the International world has its own interpretation. My mother was born on the Honshu Island of Japan and my father is from down south(U.S.). So im not a Yankee. O. K. Aussie Girl, for you I will find time on my busy Schedule to pop up an say hi. I will be in Honk Kong, Tokyo, Then to Brisbane. You Aussies are fun I guess.
i really agree with you, but look at some of these blogs. "Are Asian Blue Eyed". Why would anyone compare themselves to Caucasions, it happens all the time. Its as if Asians are looking for some type of honorary White Card of acceptance. Im half, but its the other half not the Caucasion half. I believe in people comparing themselves to me, not me comparing to someone else. When I see that then I know im making a dents in society. So I am a believer that pride is truly a trait everyone needs. Dont try to fit in, dare to be different. Have them copy your Culture. Dont Co-Opt American culture, but create a new chapter in it. Angry Asian, People like you that stand for something are the only ones that will make change. Ass Kissers will settle for anything. Be the Rule, not the exception. I stand by that rule.
To Lexor:I have recently entered the link you posted and eventually gained access to the site you recommended. I was appalled. There was not one positive comment made about Asians: except for the one. However this was followed by many abusive comments made by others. The difference between the site you posted and this site here is mind blowing: for future advice Lexor DO NOT recommend a site again.
Why do Asian men only complain that Asian women and white women don't want them! Like i can understand your frustration with Asian women not being attracted to someone in there own race, but please explain the white part. White isn't the only other race option outside Asian. I'm sure that if you guys opened your options you'd find that a lot of pretty Latina's, black, native, Indian and so on girls are attracted to you. I'm tired of everyone always acting like white is the prize if your own race bails out on you. Open your eyes to everyone regardless of race, cause what matters in the long run is how the person treats and cares for you. Bye the way I think Asian guys are hot!
That blog entry is about the Memoirs of a Geisha movie. I doubt very much that a magazine like Hyphen gives a damn about being like white people.There are many kinds of Asian Americans (or Asians of the diaspora since we're talking about Asians in Austrailia too). I think people have different experiences growing up, and depending on their own upbringing and values, some of them turn out white-washed and aspiring to whiteness. Some people may grow up wanting to be white, but then open their eyes later and develop pride in their culture. And some people were brought up with pride.I agree with Angry Azn Brotha. I see lots of proud, ambitious Asian men. But I do also see lots of wanna-be-whites. That makes me sad.
Hello, im in Tokyo again on buisness. So the Aussies were saying bad things about Asians on Lexor site. When I was there I heard some of their complaints. It appears some of the grypes were to many Asians are in the Sydney area. Some of those Aussies are not to Happy about that. They didnt know I was Asian because im mixed. I just love people for who they are. Dont you agree Aussie Girl?
To “another_angry_azn_brotha” (and all other Bitter Asian men);“I resented every white person there and still do in some degree” – I can understand why you may feel this way. However, you should be filled with pride; you broke away from the social restrictions and by the sounds of things succeeded in life. This should be an example to all other “bitter Asian men” that you have as much chance as your white neighbours to be a success. Most white people view Asians as a threat (as was stated in a previous blog) – when I think “Asian”, I automatically think “smart” – this is due to their “competitive” nature - contradicting the statement “Asian guys don’t even try”. I am sorry that you had to grow up in an environment where you were discriminated against on a daily basis. But as you said “I would not be where I am if I had not gone through that” proving that you transformed a negative situation and turned it into the fuel to feed your desire to “change the status quo/hierarchy”. This should serve as an encouragement to all other Asian men, there is no need to bitter – and if you are feeling bitter, it is no one else’s fault but your own, you have chose to live a bitter life. As RELAX wittily summed it up: “Be the rule, not the exception”.
Yea, Asian men!Get confident, idiots!
To RELAX:It is so great to have you join us again so soon! And yes, I TOTALLY agree with you. I mean, you cannot judge someone based on their appearance - this is is something they did not choose. However, I determine my opinions of someone based purely upon their character - something that they have control over! Asians did not choose to be Asians and Whites did not choose to be Whites. But you Lexor chose to be a jerk and you RELAX chose not to be. And to your response, yes here in Australia; specifically in Sydney there is prejudice towards Asians. There is a boy in my class who found out that I had a crush on an Asian - he response?? He wrote the 'average penis' sizes' of whites, Asians and and dark people. Obviously, according to him the whites were the leader by far. He tried to turn me off from Asians - pointing at all the negative aspects. As a result, I turned around and told him straight out what i thought about him and his 'statistics' - lets just say I don't think he will be talking to me anytime in the near future hehe.Well, RELAX it was good hearing from you again. I hope you enjoy your stay in Tokyo - should be heaps of asians chics falling at your 'cool-American' feet LOL
In America every monority is a threat. with 12 million illegal aliensundocumented. The numbers of whites are declining. Its a mess over here
Seven Years in Tibet was a sweet movie. Asians love me.
RELAX:"The numbers of whites are declining. Its a mess over here" - wouldn't that be a beneficial thing? This means that America is becoming more multicultural - thus evening out the ratios between the races.
Single Asian Man seeks Asian woman who is through with getting fucked by white men.
Thing is Aussie Girl, I'm not convinced multiculturalism is THAT good a thing.I for one think it is ailing in Australia.On topic:I've noticed within my group of asian friends there are 2 ways they mainly interpret the situation. You have the half who are borderline racist and refuse to date outside of asians and then you have the others who are bitter asian men:PSo, as a result you have a half who refuse to date/try with white girls on principle and the other half who are too angry to try...and end up whining all day.Its a lose lose situation that I doubt will end anytime soon.As for all the guys telling us to "try harder"...for me *trying* isn't an issue...I have an issue about being deemed "second rate" physically and sexually by white mainstream society.
*act black*...hmm. what great advice
Aussie GirlIts already multi-cultural. We do not need anymore culture over here. We cannot house the world. Lady Australia can open her doors a little more
RELAX, I doubt it. Our racism isn't as explicit as it is in America but its still there...kind of underneath the "We are SO multicultural..." image.
To Aussie Girl:Thank you for your kind words. I do have a lot of pride; not from breaking "away from social restrictions", but from, for the most part, who i've become and my journey so far to this point in my life.I don't believe that asians are at a disadvantage compared to our white counterparts. Here in Vancouver, there is a huge asian population so ethnicity is not a huge issue when it comes to employment, or at least i would hope not. On the contrary, i think asians would have the upper hand when it comes to jobs. Asians have a facade of being harder working and more efficient employees.Most white people view Asians as a threat (as was stated in a previous blog) – when I think “Asian”, I automatically think “smart”you better believe it! And I am a double threat cause I am smart and good looking (and maybe a bit arrogant lol).I don't think being bitter is always a bad thing. I was bitter. But again, that is why i am determined to change the status quo/social hierarchy, because I want to be on top. It's all about how you channel that bitterness.To Relax:I compare myself to other people all the time, especially successful white professionals. That doesn't mean i want to be them. It just simply means that i want the same things if not more.
To MUT:“Our racism isn't as explicit as it is in America but its still there...kind of underneath the "We are SO multicultural..." image.”Where have you been this entire year? Remember the Cornulla riots earlier this year? How crazy things turned? I was reluctant to return to beach until things calmed down. Australia’s racism is just as obvious as the racism in America. I know the riot was mainly between the Lebanese and the Australians, though the Australians took out their anger on all other minority races – including the Asians. I remember reading in the newspaper a recount where these two Asians were chased down the street by a mob of frustrated Australians and they had jumped into their car, which was later smashed by the mob, it required an army of police officers to settle the matter. When I had showed this article with disgust to my white friend, who was sitting next to me, she fell to the ground laughing, crying “Kat imagine those two puny Asians scared s***-less in their car”. I was shocked. In my eyes, my friend was just as bad as those other Australians who took part in the riot. Thus racism is a major issue in Australia, why else do you think that I contribute to this blog – you can probably guess the school that I attend (just look at my first entries) and can appreciate our little time I have to spare – but I fell passionate about this issue, and thus am willing to write on a daily basis.To another_angry_azn_brotha (MUT read this too):“I compare myself to other people all the time, especially successful white professionals”You my friend should serve as a prime example to all other Asian men (across the world) that there is truly no need to be bitter. All bitter Asian men (and white people) should be comparing themselves to you, fullstop. You don’t let the fact that you are an Asian pollute your mind (like MUT does) in believing that you are “second rate" physically and sexually” – this can be reflected in your words “And I am a double threat cause I am smart and good looking”. So this is a message to all Asian men out there, THERE IS NO NEED TO BE BITTERAnd finally, last but definitely not less, RELAX:I guess that was unwise of me to conclude that “the declining of white people” would serve as a solution to this “bitter Asian men” business. Trust me, “Lady Australia” (ha) has opened its doors far enough – there is a variety of nationalities here – after all we are renowned for our “multicultural” image. I guess the true solution to this social problem lies within those that are affected: “It's all about how you channel that bitterness” – thus you can chose to follow one of two paths. The first being designed for all those Asian men who believe that they are destined to led bitter lives or the second path for all those Asian men who believe that they are an equal to their white companions, in all area, and thus have no limits to how much they can achieve in life.I leave you all with this – as you are aware of, I am NOT an Asian. Because I attend the top school in Australia, I am one of the few non-Asians there (proving my point that Asians ARE exceptionally intelligent). Thus I am constantly reminded of this fact by many of my friends at school – and also by the staff there. However, there is rumour going around that those “few non-Asians” who do attend my school, are given special preference by the staff. There is truly no proof of this – well at least I can’t think of an example of where this has occurred. My point is, I am aware of that there is a belief “that whites are the golden-standard” – yet this HAS NOT prevented all my Asian companions from trying to succeed in life. For this I have proof. In the top five schools in Australia, ASIANS are the MAIN nationality. Thus, you Asians should NOT be wasting your intelligence on matters like this. The actions and words of the white population are spiteful – this is because they are jealous. Why? Because they are aware of your true potential, and will do anything to hold you down.
I work for tsa and I see alot of asian women with white men. I notice both tend to have a condescending attitude toward black people, it's like , "we're on top of the food chain, you're not".
I didn't give my conclusion. If these relationships were so wholesome, why do they have to despise everybody else? I've seen this over and over again. Also, I've noticed some dark skinned women, who are of asian descent, sometimes east indian, really have to prove that their not a nigger. They have to display such a hostile attitude toward blacks to show they're not one of us. I have dated a girl from Laos, and two from the Philippines, but I'm content with black women who don't smoke crack. (smiles)I know I'm just going to be attacked for posting this, because I know people don't want to discuss this type of thing honestly. If I'm ridducoulus, then it shouldn't bother you, but people get hostile when I bring this up, because they know there's more than some truth in it.
I think you're misguided if you think violence in Australia is anywhere as bad as America.And I think your friend's comment is proof to myself that there is a need to be bitter. What did your friend first think when she heard about asians in a potentially violent situation? "Omg they're SO tiny" Which leads onto my point about us being viewed as "second rate"...You took that comment wrongly; I DO NOT think of myself as physically second rate. I have found it is a stereotype white girls (like your friend) still have. I see it as fuel to better myself so that I am physically on par or above with the white males I go to school with. This is the reason I lift weights, train combat sports, play rugby etc...its like a proof to myself. Afterall, like you said...the asians have the "study" part covered;)Having said all that, this white girl situation is the only one in the Asian/white debate that has got me stumped.You say that there is a"second path for all those Asian men who believe that they are an equal to their white companions, in all area, and thus have no limits to how much they can achieve in life"---> That's all well and good but asians here are still a step below whites in the social hierarchy... so yes there are "no limits" to what we can achieve technically...but white bias is making it harder. For example, my friend's band being told that they need a non-asian front man because an asian front man won't be able to pull girls in, the girls that make up 80% of the fanbase of crappy pop bands.And no I don't know which school you go to. A top school in Australia with girls...James Ruse? Sydney Girls High? PLC? North Sydney Girls?Point is: HSC sucks.
woo Strongyyellow woman, strong comment, but im a big fan of Muhammad Ali. He was the best, and an example to all who can relate not falling for that mainstream trap. Al Queda well thats to extreme.
Angry Asian:Just because a Person wants to be succesful doesnt men he wants to be White. I know successful professionals of all races and are proud of who they are, Me for one. The problem I have is when people think you must look like Beyonce, or Paris Hilton for Social status sense thats all we see on these pop magazines. Im half/black, half Asian. Can you imagine the discrimination I went through. My mother being born and raised in Asia moving to the states, Comming from a traditional East Asian family, wooooo, did she piss them off, but at the same time, I had a great life and wouldnt change it for nothing.Aussie Girl:I think it would behoove you to take American History, I think you are really left in the dark. I mean learn from Non-Caucasion authors. I mean get really into it. The reason I say this is because we have 100ds of year old scars that havent healed yet with most minorities. Ive been to Australia, You guys are a fast and rising melting pot, but no were near the states. Therefore, you guys truly and I mean truly do not have the domsetic problems we have. Well at least at a lower scale.I compare myself to people I admire, alot of them are not white, bur some are. Im not wrapped up in this White World. If you keep looking at a particular race as being supreme it gets to a point to were is a form a of flattery for them.
Asian men complain about white women (and not others) not liking them because they buy into the "white is better" bullshit in this country. That makes them no better than the Asian women they are complaining about who they think are traitors to their race by dating white men. Guys, stop with the double standards already. I agree, stop acting like white is the prize!
To MUT:Got it in the first go: James Ruse (DUH)“I think you're misguided if you think violence in Australia is anywhere as bad as America”I never wrote that the violence in Australia is as “bad” as in America – I just stated that here in Australia, we too experience the violence between the nationalities. I am well aware of the fact that the situation is slightly better here, here in our “multicultural” society. However the only reason why I think the situation is better here is because of the government, Howard was appalled with the on goings earlier this year between the races – thus he took drastic measures. Why? Because he wanted to save Australia face – he DID NOT want Australia to bee seen by the rest of the world as a “racist” country. Perhaps, America is just not as effective as us to keep all these tensions between the races “hushed-up”.“And I think your friend's comment is proof to myself that there is a need to be bitter. ..Which leads onto my point about us being viewed as "second rate"...”Alright – you have a point here. BUT this “friend” of mine is only one person. I am also a white person. And it is clear how I feel about this issue. Thus so far the ratio is one to one…“there are "no limits" to what we can achieve technically...but white bias is making it harder”Ever asked yourself why this is so?? They are envious of your true potential – ever since the Gold mining days – the whole “yellow peril” episode, where the “true Aussies” ran around cutting the Asians pony tails off and sabotaged their mining areas etc. They did this all because a) the Asians did not follow their traditional ways BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY b)the Asians were having more success in the goldmines due to the fact that they worked harder and longer hours and c)the white girls at the time where marrying the Asians. This course of study is in the syllabus stages 4 and 5 – thus it is mandatory for all Australian students to study. Thus it is now a known fact amongst the younger generation of Australians – changing the way we perceive Asians compared to our older generation.“For example, my friend's band being told that they need a non-asian front man because an asian front man won't be able to pull girls in, the girls that make up 80% of the fanbase of crappy pop bands.”I can completely understand where you are coming from. And it is moments like this that I am truly revolted by our society. However, if your friend’s band, with the leading man being Asian, was great – they will be pulling girls from all different nationalities. I understand that the music industry is “image-based” BUT one’s image can only take a band so far, the success of the band lies within their artistic abilities. When one plays your bands music, I am sure that they are more interested in the words and the quality of their music then if they were Asians, African, American etc. Thus, they should not take that suggestion of having a “white” leading man too seriously.Oh – I agree the “HSC sucks”. BUT it’s worth it. I want to become a barrister – I do not care if I have to suffer for one year if it means that I can fulfill my ambition.
RELAX:You are half black / half Asian. To be honest – I automatically assumed that your second half was fair-skinned. I am not sure how I came to this conclusion. I guess I did because you have never hinted that you have personally experienced discrimination – not implying anything here. I am really, really sorry that you too had to face discrimination in your life – but I am so glad that you did not let this get to you and have led a “great life” as a result. Another example for all those men who claim that they are “bitter Asians” – for RELAX, this was a complete new ball game and he kicked-arsed.And you know what? I am going to take your advice: I am definitely going to probe deeper into American’s history. You sound very well educated on this – for you, I will squeeze this extra bit of work into my hectic schedule. Thank you.
한 국 사 람 최 고 다!
Where did all this come from? Well at least make some kind of sense when you speak nelson. Had a wonderful stay in Tokyo off to Hong Kong. Thanks Aussie Girl, How is your situation going?
Good luck with the barrister thing then...I just want to go to uni already:P-->Trials on monday:("Thus so far the ratio is one to one…"In this context maybe, overall I still believe white girls and guys have this impression of asian males.I haven't studied the gold rush period so i can't really comment on that analogy...but I get your point. However, the white dominated media and white dominated ways of thought in western society are harder to overcome than some in this blog and elsewhere are saying. I mean yeah they *might* be paranoid about the yellow peril or whatever but the reason is irrelevant.China's upcoming social and economic boom may change this..I hope so anyway.As for the band thing, popular culture is image. You don't have the right image, you won't make it.... The most skilled musicians lie outside of popular culture for a reason.
ERGH – this is becoming addictive.Thanks for the good wishes. Same to you. I hope you perform exceptionally well in your trails – it doesn’t hurt when you attend a selective :)“You don't have the right image, you won't make it.... The most skilled musicians lie outside of popular culture for a reason.”Nope. I totally disagree with you. There are so many well-named artists out there that take the word “unattractive” to a new level. If you have talent and the motivation to succeed, you will. Take Michael Jackson for example – dude, the guy makes me sick to look at him – yet I have his songs on my mp3 (right after Mariah Carrie and before Pink – I listen to a variety of music) plus he is supposedly the “King of Pop”. MUT if a man covered in plastic can sell record-breaking records, I am sure an Asian can too.
To RELAX:What! You are moving again…so soon! Gees, that is hectic, and you still find time to reply?! I know that you said your schedule would be busy, but this is just crazy! Well you asked about my situation – lets see: I will try to keep it brief (for your sake). Well to be honest, I am trying to ‘get over it’ (as you so ‘politely’ put it previously hehe) – but that is not going too well. I will tell myself that I am over it, yet I will see him and I know what I am saying is just wishful thinking on my behalf…I am hoping that what you said before would be true, that all I need is time (and you would think that a year would had been long enough!!) I guess my problem is that I cannot pin-point my attraction – thus I am not too sure how to ignore my feelings towards him…Hong Kong hey…what…weren’t the women in Tokyo hot enough?? Hehehe (yeah – I know it is all ‘business’ work)Well RELAX keep me updated on your social life – any special girls??
Michael Jackson was popular before he became white iirc.I was referring more to the modern pop scene anyway. Nowadays its about how hot you are or the image you portray (50cent's gangsta image for example).back on topic.....Year 12 formal is on in a couple of months. Wonder how many asian guys will turn up with white girls...not many I'll bet. Though there are a few asian guys in my year that go only really for white girls, I'd like to see the ratio between AA/AF couples to AA/WF couples when it happens.Anyone here ever been/heard of someone being rejected because of the small penis stereotype? I've never seen it happen though I'm sure its happened before.Also...anyone knowo good websites that talk about this topic (preferably forums)...besides the fighting 44's?
I have a better question instead of:"Wonder how many asian guys will turn up with white girls"Why not ask:"I wonder how many Asians are going to achieve the top UAIs?"Taking a white girl to the formal is not an achievement - so who cares if you go with a black, white or an Asian. At the end of the night you'd probably be too drunk to remember.Oh - there are some other intersting sites: wait up will I recall the addresses
Here:http://www.japan-guide.com/forum/quereadisplay.html?0+18812ive skimmed through it - initially the discussion is bout japanese males - but like all forums - it becomes more general and includes are AsiansHave fun
Because getting a top UAI is irrelevant when concerning interracial dating:PAnd yes taking a white girl to the formal is small, but you know it may lead to more. And by more I mean a proper relationship....something that is still quite an objective for some, as shown by this thread.thanks for the link.
I was being insensitive. I just remembered that you were, what is the euphemism? Umm had your offer declined to escort a “white” girl to your year ten formal. However, if you still wish to be seen with a “white” girl in public – good luck. RELAX once told me this, let us see if I can recall off-by-heart: “you will either hit or miss”. I just do not believe that you were over your “refusal” that occurred two years ago.

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