Bitter Asian Man

April 20, 2006

Interspecies, I mean interracial, dating/sex/love seems to be the subject that has raised the most interest among Hyphen’s blog readers – 120 comments since July '05 and counting. The membership of the Bitter Asian Men Club (BAMC) seems to be growing by leaps and bounds as well.

By all indications, it may not cease to be an issue that has warranted such ferocious debates today even when the majority of Western Europe, North America, Australia – heck the rest of the world, for that matter, will be either Mexicans or Chinese because there is a certain amount of self-fulfilling prophecy involved on the part of the BAMC’s members.

While I empathize with and understand the sentiments expressed by the “imagined” and actually rejected Asian men out there, partisans in this debate tend to resort to tired clichés and stereotypes and, at times, down-right absurd responses in reaction to the question about their preference/choice of sex/love mates.

I always wonder what would have happened if Western Europe had not gone on a rampage in the name of Christianity. What would have happened if the conquistadors had been women? Like all forms of warfare, and just a matter of variation, men in conquest plunder the village of the defeated, destroy their culture, rape their women, humiliate and emasculate (castrate!) the men, literally and figuratively.

For those of us born, raised and schooled in North America and Western Europe, being captives of history borne out of the West’s successive religious crusades, conquests and colonization, our minds can’t seem to be able to look at sex and love simply a matter of the heart…and the proper usage of the tools. Together with an open mind, of course.

When I got off the boat in the San Francisco Bay in the early 1980s, somehow I did not get the memo that Asian men were not desirable. I always thought that I had the same equipment as other men, granted that there might be variations. Like other tasks and chores, practice makes perfect.

I was further boosted by the fact that I now had more choices. Had I remained in Vietnam, my choices for sex and love would have been quite limited. I figured, if I cast my net wide, the odds would be better: Asian women, 20%, white women, 20%, Latino women, 20%, Black women, 20%, Mestiso/Mixed-race women another 20%. Had I included the gay and bi category in this equation, my odds of getting some would have been even better.

Co-incidentally (don’t know which part of my brain that triggered it) I soon fell under the spell of punk and alt-rock music. In smoke-filled, ear-shattering, dark dungeons (these venues somehow tended to locate in the basement!) that were the punk music nightclubs, it was not all difficult to hook up, even for an FOB with a poor command of English. In this atmosphere, it did not take much for me to communicate what I wanted: Can I buy you a drink? Do you want to leave now? Let’s go somewhere. And with the hairdos, the clothes, not to mention the garish make-up, I did not look so bad among the punksters.

The subsequent conversations with these women now had been facilitated by some good loving the night before. They became much easier. Besides, we had punk music and our social/political beliefs to talk about.

However, it wasn’t long before the Yellow Peril-Hop Sing-Kato-Dr. Fu Manchu-Bruce Lee-The Green Berets-The Deer Hunter-Apocalypse Now virus entered my blood stream and began to play tricks with my otherwise fully-empowered Asian-born mind. As I became more “American,” I learned that the “White Men” had discovered literally everything, from the Yeti to the G-Spot. They have written books on which fork, among four on the table, to use when you take a woman out to a fancy restaurant on the first date. I also discovered that growing up without Hollywood and Madison Avenue, America’s brain trust and repositories of social code of conduct, moral values, tastes and aesthetics, I had been going about life all wrong. I now have to unlearn my backward oriental ways.

About the same time, December 2, 1990 to be exact, a reporter named Joan Walsh, whom I believe is now Salon’s editor-in-chief, wrote the 5,370-word article feature in the Sunday Magazine of then-real-newspaper, the San Francisco Examiner called “Asian Women, Caucasian Men.” The piece dealt with then-exploding interracial dating phenomena on the UC Berkeley campus that gave birth to the Bitter Asian Men Club. (ModelMinority.com somehow managed to keep it here in its archives).

The Asian men in this piece, and many that I have read since, didn’t come out looking so good themselves either. It seemed, like then and now, some members of BAMC are obsessed with being rejected by Asian women and that their only recourse is white women, knowing full well that they are not wanted here either.

I was aware of the prostitution industry that was an integral part of the American military adventures in Asia and that many of the soldiers ended up marrying former prostitutes, and even brought them home to moms and dads. But things like “Asian women fetish,” or white men “like rice” instead of “white bread” were a bit much for me. I understand that if one eats chicken for a while, a big slab of beef looks rather tempting. That’s OK. But not because there is something WRONG with the chicken.

Furthermore, I found the notion that some Asian women choose white men because Asian men remind them of their cousin/uncle/father/brother was rather absurd. You think white women say the same thing about white men?

“Mary Jo, honestly, I don’t think I want to go out with Billy Bob. He reminds me of my brother Jethro. His idea of fun is to watch NASCAR every weekend, except for his old high school’s football games. He chews tobacco & spits in the corner. And, boy, how much I hate it when he crushes those beer cans against his forehead.”

If the lackluster manhood on the part of the Asian men is in question, look at the rest of the country. Look at the domestic violence and date rape statistics and the perps that get picked up for the misdeeds. The majority of them don’t look Asian to me. Look at the social values shared by the majority of Americans (read: white), they don’t look all that enlightened to me. (Since we are talking about the mixing of the races in North America, Australia and Western Europe, so please leave the Asians in Asia and their problems out of the debate).

It all boils down to the fact that our minds have been poisoned by histories borne out of conquests. Contemporary liberal ideals about love and sex have been manufactured and maintained by the ruling elites where most of us are not even welcome to join their club. Read all the books about love and sex, watch all the videos and DVDs for the best pick-up lines, it still cannot beat practice. Rejection is part of the deal. My dad loved to say this: If you step on a pile of poop, wash your feet and keep on walking. You don’t cut them off.

Sonny Le is a San Francisco Bay-based communications consultant and an occasional pontificator who has the complete collection of John Hughes' 80's teen-comedy classics and Porky's I, II and III. He is also a Hyphen advisory board member.

He recommends the following books for your further edification: Jack Rutherford’s Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World, Harry Frankfurt’s On Bullshit, Karen Armstrong’s Islam: A Short History, The Great Transformation: The Beginning of Our Religious Traditions and many other fine titles. Or, "If books are too much, go to Wikipedia.com and type in 'Dark Ages,' 'The Age of Enlightenment' or 'Renaissance Period.' Learn about the histories of the British East India Company and the Dutch East India Company. Better yet, read a few history books not written by dead, or living, white people.”

Contributor: 

Momo Chang

Senior Contributing Editor

Momo Chang is the Content Manager at the Center for Asian American Media, and freelances for magazines, online publications, and weeklies. Her writings focus on Asian American communities, communities of color, and youth culture. She is a former staff writer at the Oakland Tribune. Her stories range from uncovering working conditions in nail salons, to stories about “invisible minorities” like Tongan youth and Iu Mien farmers. She has freelances The New York Times, WIRED, and East Bay Express, among other publications.

Comments

Comments

I just pulled up this site and its really wierd that asians guys are having a hard time getting white girls. Hear in VA the shoe is on the other foot. I am white, 5'3, green eyes, thin and trying to get into med school. It is hard as hell to get a asian guy to even think about a coffee date with me. I could get any white/black, but I am not attracted to them. Most asian guys hear don't date out side of asian cultrue. Where do I need to go to find one that does?
[Long rambling comments with racial slurs deleted. No haters on this site, please. -web editor]
I had a submitted my article that was removed by the biased racist websit editor. I prose was constructed in a manner in which reflected sarcasm , they were not my actual values or opinions. However since your magazine is so culturally hip and socially aware I thought that the pun would be understood. I did not think your Nazi editor would actually take it literally. MY point is that Sonny Le pathetic white bahing commentary is an outrage to any social or politically correct organization or magazine. To reduce white men to beer crushing hill-billies that lay around , beat thier wives and watch NASCAR is an outrage! I guess that's o.k. though , right? Oh , yeah , it's because he's asian and your asian. Now I get it , wait that's called biased right? I'll see about matbe dealing with this website from the ISP arbitration department and see if they'll tolerate haters as well. What do you think?The fact that he promotes that people do not read books from white men dead or alive and you actually keep the content on your site is repulsive. Yet you remove mine! Wow! This is America , right? Oh ,wait, Asiai America , right? Is thatthe agenda?I like reading good books irrespective of the race of the author.Why would your organiztion support his racist comments?I am suprised there is not a advertisement of evry page for Margaret Cho ? She hates white people too!
I’ve always sympathized with Asian men when it came to the interracial dating imbalance. I know the unfair, discriminating and stereotypical aspect of it myself. I am a 29 yr. old Black female. However, there are many other race of women in America/world. You have Black, Latin, Indian etc. Why is there a must for a White woman? As years go by, I’ve read articles, rants etc. from Asian men. I’ve now come to realize, Asian men are also far more bias and very discriminating when dating women, especially with women of darker race. Just like how most of them feel excluded, stereotyped and degraded, they are doing to same to others and that is even more hypocritical.
The big problem with Asians is our parents who threw their sons & daughters into the popular culture of America instead of instilling their own values. They so much wanted their kids to be American, so they'll be successful and fit in, I have hard time convincing young asians about white racism and how much they really dislike us. Young people, especially Asians want to fit in and perhaps dating a white man makes them feel more a part of the American experience.When you scrape away that superficial bullshit, the emotional barriers to dating someone inside your own race is less difficult. Asian men have to remember, it's not important what men think, it's important to see how women think. Why are my girlfriend's friends going after me, but stay away from me, if I'm single. Because women watch other women to see if the water is warm and then jump in. If you think I'm wrong, then why are all these teachers having sex with student stories popping up after Mary Kay LaTourneau did it? How come some cities you go to, you see nothing but white girls with black guys and another city, you see nothing but white girls with asian guys. Because people are sheep and they follow, and they do what every body else does. Asian men have to start promoting themselves, promoting each other, make being an asian man or being with an asian man desireable. Stop whining and do something about it.dl
also, check out hyphen's sex survey in issue seven. more asian men than women thought that their race was a liability in their sex lives, but by no means a majority of men felt this way. in fact, many male respondants wrote in that they had no problem "getting ass" and complainers were just that.i think there's a lot of truth to the feminization of asian men, but there's also a lot of falsehood. and, ultimately, attitude can always trump prejudice.
What if the white woman was born and raised in an Asian country, where the only exposure to white guys she had was her relatives?Sanaa Lathan did an interview on Oprah where she said statistics show more Black men date White women than Black women date white guys.My point is, is this something cultural or what? Why is it that AF's & BM seem more willing to date interracially than their counterparts? I don't know, but I wish somebody would do a study or something instead of discounting it as nonsense. I hate all the nasty fighting that goes on and it doesn't get us anywhere. It's a real issue for some people and I'd like some real answers.It's also gotten to the point where we've forgotten about the AM's who married outside their race. James Wong Howe, Pat Morita, Cary Tagawa, etc etc. Remember those anti-miscegnation laws from the early 20th century? They ALWAYS showed pics of Asian men with white women. Remember what people said back then? "Don't let the Yellow Man marry our women!" Because back then you'd more likely see Asian men with other women. Guys who complain about AF's let the AM's right off the hook.
I just saw the movie Batman Begins.Artistically, I thought it was a great movie with very high production values.I think I can separate my appraisal and my politics. And therefore say that this movie was also marred by some racism -- racism that is endemic to the Hollywood/LA movie industry and to the New York TV industry.The pattern of racist depiction is almost always this: strong asian men are portrayed as villians or as inferior to white men. Strong asian men are a threat or need to be taught white values.In the beginning of the movie, we have Bruce Wayne in a chinese prison. He is single handedly ass whooping 6 or so asian inmates. (I had flashbacks of the beginning of Last Samurai, where Tom Cruise's character absurdly, single handedly taking and beating several armored samurai. His cavalry sword is not really designed to slash through that armor very well, and I thought union soldiers trained in swordsmanship nearly as much as samura.i) The movie doesn't explain where he learned his martial arts or how he learned to fight since he was just a spoiled rich kid.These scenes, also imitated in many other action movies establishes white male superiority to asian men.Later, the movie shows that the leader of the League of Shadows is an asian man -- played by Ken Watanabe. Strong asian men are also often portrayed as immoral or evil, compared to white men.Bruce Wayne's teacher is played by Liam Neeson (a fine performance as usual). The role of teacher or master is almost always a role of respect. And therefore, even with asian male's stereotypical association with martial arts, the role of "sensei" is more often given to non-asians. Ie: Xena's teacher, Lara Croft's teacher, and in the Star Wars series, etc...Perhaps white men have resented the stereotypical association of martial artist master with asian men. And therefore, through many many movies, have turned that association upside down, by associating the imagery of the asian male master of the martial arts into villainy or inferiority to white men.Of course there are exceptions that reach the american media mainstream, but how many can you count in a decade as compared to the trend?I'm a guy, and I love action movies. I have seen many movies with detrimental images: Rambo 2, Bloodsport, Tomb Raider 2, Dr. No, Batman Begins, Karate Kid 2 (a good movie except for the formula white guy beats up asian guy and gets asian gal plot), Die Another Day, Hong Kong 1997, Fast and the Furious, ... the list is endless.There are an endless number of movies that demonize asian men.Of course not all asian males are portrayed negatively. The old, children, and gay asian men are usually not portrayed villainously as the young and somewhat fit.I wonder why there is such an enduring and ingrained pattern of hostility to strong asian men in America's fantasy & mass communication industries?These questions and observations are unavoidable if there is any honest quest for intellectual integrity.And the answers may be deeply troubling.Aside from the answers to these questions (because it is sad to think about) what is the effect on Asian Americans who grow up watching this stuff?I've seen many, and I think when I was younger -- as a teen and in college, it did harm my self esteem & self confidence. I think the other possible impact is that would have pushed me to identify as white -- at least until others would kick me out of the "white club" by calling me a chink or jap.How would it have affected asian american women? I'm not sure if asian american women would have gotten as strong a dose of the negative images if they weren't action movie fans.However, I think that many asians, either in America or back in Asia, are fairly sensitive to social cues, and if one grew up in areas fairly isolated from a healthy asian american community, would have absorbed the negative racism.I recalling reading a little of Amy Tan's biography and it stated that as a child she was ashamed of her mother because she was so Chinese.I would guess that in the area of dating, fashionable imagery and fitting in, is very big among young adults everywhere. For asian-americans, I don't think that asian men are portrayed as fashionable, accepted, nor as popular.
Oh yeah and don't forget about those new Star Wars movies with that horrible dark vader actor.Maybe I just think too much but I thought those evil fish type creatures from the federation that took over nabu were supposed to be asian.Also was I the only one that thought chingy rapping about having chinky eyes was offensive?ps don't goto Club Pink in SF they don't like asian men but they'll let asian girls go it no questions asked. (no, I'm not a member of BAMC nor do I plan on being one, toocorny.)
Dear Daz & JSP:Great points & great questions.Regarding white women born in Asian countries, because of race and class and the reasons for them being there, many white people, the Brits during the colonial periods especially, HELD ON to their "superior and civilized" ways of life even more -- living in isolated compounds, European-only quarters, under armed guards, etc.The only Asian men who were allowed to be near the white women were likely to be houseboys and servants and the occasional "corrupt" local government lackeys. Of course there were exceptions and that things are somewhat (emphasize SOMEWHAT) different today. (Funny thing about living abroad is that you tend to hold on to your former ways of life even more tightly.)I have a few friends, currently living and working in Asia, who have either DATED for MARRIED local Asian men. But this has more to do with the working environments that they are in where they meet other Asian men who share similar interests and have similar professions. And this also answers, I hope, in my limited knowledge and understanding of the matter, your question about Asian and Black public figures/actors/athletics who were/are seen with white women.Furthermore, you must have heard of the handy “theory” about “marrying up,” and no doubt there is also “fetish,” which cuts both ways. About Asian and Black men letting each other off the hook, unfortunately sexism and chauvinism still reign in most quarters.Just look at how much we are obsessed over older women dating/marrying younger men but scant attention is paid to older men dating/marrying women younger than their granddaughters.JSP…one example I have for you (of course there are many more) is the 2002 Hong Kong’s blockbuster “Internal Affairs,” with Andy Lau and Tony Leung Chiu Wai in the leads. Instead of allowing the American filming-going public to see how great the acting chops of these two “oriental” actors are, and not to mention how SEXY they look, Hollywood bought the rights to film and is remaking it with Leo DiCaprio and Matt Damon in the leads and Martin Scorsese directing. What’s up with that?Year after year we read about the absence of Asians, Latinos & Blacks on TV or in leading/meaningful roles, but has it changed much? Not really. It’s funny how we attack Hollywood, THE MEDIA and other institutions in abstract and impersonal ways. I say, it’s high time that we single out the men and the women who are responsible…naming names.Just look at the names of the writing teams of all the popular sitcoms and shows such as Jon Steward’s and Jay Leno’s. What do we see and what do they all have in common? A bunch of white guys, most young and educated and mostly East Coast’s Ivy Leaguers.This is where I often say that at times I prefer to deal with a xenophobic rightwing nut job instead of a self-professed Thai-food-eating-yoga-stretching-Prius-driving-Ang Lee’s movies-loving-anything-by Amy Tan-reading-reggae-rocking-Cuban jazz-swinging white liberal/progressive because I know where the nut job comes from.What about us? What about self-accountability? It’s bad enough that we have been placed in a box with many undesirable labels, a good number of us EVEN create another box for ourselves – a box within a box.(Claire, thanks for the sex survey info. My blogging here is all YOUR fault!)
I work at a grocery store as a bagger.Whites and blacks look at me like I did something to them.Perhaps because there is a belief that Asians are not up to par with the white and black races.
It comes down to sexual competition doesn't it? It often does because in this game that nature and society has dumped on us, everyone is a player no matter whehter they desire to partake in the self expression, self affirmation, and self perpetuation process known as mating or not.There are the anecdotal stories: one asian man has no problems dating, we have a black woman friend who is dating and asian man (or do we?), we have have white women that are married to asian men...the road is littered with exceptions to the rule.Ah, but there are rules (though sometimes unsaid until you break them) and there are patterns. Sometimes, you can't help but notice that there is some crazy phenoms going on...like when some Asian women tell me that they do not Asian men attractive, like the out marriage rate of the jewish population in the united states, like the out marriage rate of asians in the US. It boggles the mind. But then you start looking at history, concepts of attractiveness, etc. it all begins to make sense.In New Orleans around the 18th, they had quadroons, women who were largely white but who had some traces of black in them. They were kept by white men because they were close enough to white to be sexually permissible but not close enough to become marriage material. These women played on their proximity to whiteness and their distance to blackness and economically it paid off because then; they could become "kept" women.It is easy to discount the patterns, but there are sentiments and it is relevant to ask why they are there. Why are black women angry? Could it be that the concept of masculinity is somehow threatened by their presence? What about a white man that could make an Asian woman feel more feminine or vice versa?These questions are worth asking, worth dissecting, worth growing through the science of biology, sociology, psychology, and economics to assess.It comes down to our concept of aesthetics doesn't it? So, what is beautiful to you and why do you consider it beautiful? How much of that is innate, internal, as opposed to marketing?
If I may throw my own unique 2 cents in...I'm an Asian American who's also a Dating Coach.Is there racism/prejudice when it comes to dating and women? You bet your ass there is.HOWEVER, a lot of times the failures of BAMCs is that they're making a mountain out of a molehill. I always use the analogy of gravity.For white guys, it's the standard 9.81 m/s^2, for Asian guys, it's more like 9.9 m/s^2. Yes, it's a little harder. Yes you're bench pressing a whole extra 5 pounds.What you AREN'T doing is carrying a 50 pound weight on your back. And that's what happens mentally with a lot of Asian men whom I both meet in real life as well as teach. They're mentally setting themselves up for failure before they even have a chance to step into the sexual and dating arena.There's a lot of deprogramming involved as well as the practical skills necessary.
There are NO Asian men in America anymore except those who possess two-gun wielding ability, pirouetting-on-air ability, (or a combinatin of both) or some-other-fantasy-historical(ancient, that ability. Unless, of course, you can do martial arts and comedy or you are a gay Asian male. Haven't seen any straight Asian men on TV or movies or even achoring the news or writing a book or just being a guy unless either perceived as "weak" "comedic" "martial-artsy." No, Asian men are not whining or bitter -- they can't -- they don't exist. The concept of "Strong Asian Men," in America, has a "Chinaman's chance." Well, of course, we have some recent imports in the sports-arena, but they are Godzillas and Grinning Drooling Giants so they aren't real either. (Note: I am working on my disseration "The Convenient Truth: The Disappearing Asian Men and Did They Ever Exist?" If interested, blog me.
Asian version of Hitch has come to save us all?
dl,Is it a cultural tendency for some asian men to feel embarassed or to look down on fellow asians who complain as "whiners"?Is it because of the stoic, "eat-bitterness" attitude?Or has it evolved after centuries of imperial, confucianist governments which have executed people who have made political complaints, and criticized the status quo, spoke out for progressive change, and clamored for democratic free speech?Anyway, this "anti-complain" attitude should be scrapped.
Well Luan, There were those mixed blacks Woman that hated whites, Some of those so called light skinned woman found the blackest man they could because they resented their light European features. One must be careful with history and HIS STORY. It wasnt just New Orleans, it was throughout the south. I dont think there is a scientific fact that can answer the comments you made above relating to different races. I think in this day influences come from pop culture, and economics. We are Shallow people
this is boring
Anna,Move to California or NYC. there are tons of us. I've mostly dated white women and latinas all my life. And I'm picky.Only Asian guys who are whinning are the ones with no personalities.
There's only one thing that should matter in this debate. Love. If an Asian girl TRULY loves the whatever-race-other-than-Asian guy, and vice versa, it would be wrong for anybody to criticize that relationship. But if two persons get together for any reasons that conflict with what's really TRUE to them. Then all I can do, as a bystander, is feel pity. And hope those confused people will be able to find them true selves someday. And this is true for any race.
I am a 19 year old white female, and I prefer Asian men over any other race.As an artistic person, I have a higher understanding of aesthetics in terms of the human form than most people. Of all races, I find caucasians to be generally ugly, including myself.white people tend to have:-protruding noses-thin lips-skeletal structures with greater volume than that of other races-dirty looking coloration-a lot of body hair-bad skinFor a long time, I was only interested in black or hispanic men. My interests began to shift a year and a half ago and at this point I really only like Asian guys...I find them to be infinitely beautiful.I actually have a hard time finding Asian guys who are interested in me; the "fobby" ones tend only to like Asian girls. Being around an Asian person tends to make me feel grotesque and monstrous.
You have some serious issues Catherine
I am a black female. In Canada we all mix together and I have tried to date Asian men. They arent interested. I have a lot of Asian friends male and female. I dont know why but white men and black men seem most interested in dating me.A few months ago an Asian acquaintance of mine tried to kiss me. When I pulled away he said that it was because he was Asian. In my mind it was because he was very drunk, bi and a heavy drug user. If he had been fully straight, not a drug addict/ drunk and fit, I would have been all over him.Over here we see that guy Jet Lee and he's so hot. Maybe it where you live. Im not sure if it is PC and if Im using the word "Asian" too broad but I love the way Japanese guys speak.
Hey Asian man,I hear ya! As a Jewgirl, I have noticed that all the good looking jewish men seem to be drawn to Asian girls. There are none left for Jewgirls like me. Now frankly I would'nt care, except for that my family wants to disown me for not marrying a Jew. But too bad, because now I'm dating a SEXY Asian man! TAKE THAT SUCKAS
I am asian. I am also perceptive and honest. I don't get chicks because I'm short and ugly. Face it - average asian guys just aren't attractive.We all know it.for reference, if you were to take the most average of all the races, here is the universal but non-spoken hierarchy from top to bottom:1) white girl2) black guy3) white guy4) asian girl5) asian guy6) black girlEveryone that says 'oh you're racist, stereotype.. bla blah I could show you a heap of hot asian guys and hot black girls ...' shut the fuck up. I am talking averages here.I went back to China last summer and man, 98% of people are simply not attractive.Face it, people look different. Difference implies better or worse. It sucks, and it's not our fault. We have to be honest with it.But more importantly, we have to be so fucking lame.
Catherine, what you post is nice and all, but my problem is why did you go through black and hispanic first? as a asian male, i am offended that asians were last. and that is the problem. white girls go through everybody else, then asians last.
Why does a black woman have to settle for an asian guy (or vice versa)? That's what I think when a black women says she's interested in an asian guy (like me)... c'mon with those big chunks of manhood black guys out there? You can't be serious. We both know that's what white guy wants so there are no more whiners.
OK everyone, for the record, I'm a white woman who loves asian men, always has, finds them shockingly attractive, can't stop herself, and is frustrated and sad that, let's face it, asian men really don't want white women. Not for serious purposes. I guess I have the same insecurities as Catherine expresses having currently--but they're not really founded in unreality, are they? Also for the record, for those whom it seems to interest--i certainly did not "go through" black or hispanic phases first. No, I've been hot for asian men since the very, very beginning. Well, age 14. Not the very beginning, but...;). So it's hard. But I can't (don't really want to) change my taste, can I? Anyway, I'll probably settle in with a nice white man eventually, since the lovely men I look at will not have me, but I'll always look. Hard not to.
You people are stupid, I cant believe what im hearing, but funny
as a teen if you want girls you must be tought strong willing to fight anyone , in "white" country asians are portrayed as weak and nerdy.remember always fight for what you stand for and never let those clubbers bring you down act cool charming and tough , either have a smile on your face or stare them down if they mistreat you ,also never back down on a fight and never back down on a arguements about your race so be proud to be asian.
"white girls go through everybody else, then asians last."Black woman wondering (but not really) why actorcool doesn't mention ANY OTHER COLOR WOMAN'S ATTENTION that he's trying to attract*shaking my head*(Oh, BTW, for the other lady above - it's Jet Li, not "Jet Lee")
To all the "East" Asian men here:Stop moaning and groaning and just live your lives to the best of possibilities. Women --regardless of race-- find men with self-confidence attractive. That is the bottom line.
To all the "White" men here:Stop whining about East Asian men's complaints. BTW, stop moaning and groaning about foreigners, gays, minorities, liberals, non-Christians, etc... too.Live your lives to the best also, without containing, hindering, suppressing, oppressing, other people too.;-)Just kidding about the whining part. Debate and free speech is good.