As a teenager in San Francisco, my coming out was not a delicate process. Overnight, I donned ostentatious rainbow accessories. I snuck into gay bars, shoplifted gay porn, and managed to funnel every conversation into a cheeky sexual joke. Even at age 13, I felt I had already lost so many years of my life to the closet. My way of gaining it all back, was by being out, by being loud, and by being unquestionably seen.  

But despite my efforts, I wasn’t always seen.