Hyphen TV: I Love Cheese

December 11, 2012


     Josie appears to be describing a really big orange she zested once

Sheldon finally got some screen time on Top Chef when he and his partner Bart won the breakfast on a stick quickfire challenge. The judges loved the duo's egg, cheese, pancetta, bacon, and spinach sandwich -- and it held together nicely on the stick, unlike some of their competitors' creations. The pair won immunity, which was especially appreciated after the judges ripped all the chefs apart for underperforming to a startling degree on the elimination challenge, which had the chef pairs creating dishes to showcase different artisinal treats sold in the Pike Place Market.

      What bonds this team is great shirts

Sheldon and Bart had to work with salmon candy, which is exactly what it sounds like it is. They paired it with a sweet and sour salad, but the judges thought there wasn't enough of the salmon in the dish. Josie and her partner Eliza used their cardamom bitters to make a curry cardamom broth that they served with clams and salmon. The judges found the broth way too salty, muting the delicate floral flavors of the cardamom. They also found sand and even bits of rock in the dish, and it's a testament to how poorly executed some of the other dishes were that Josie didn't see the bottom in this particular challenge. Finally, Kristen and her partner Micah served their cheese curds three ways: raw, bechamel, and fried. The judges found the dish to have too many components, making the curds hard to discern. Padma commented, "I didn't know that that one nugget of fried brownness was cheese and I love cheese." Yikes, guys! It was tough to hear the criticism this time around, but none of our pals landed in the bottom this time. Let's hope that they (and the rest of the chefs) pull themselves together next week.

    Kristen shows us that the Pike Place Market is cold

On Project Runway All Stars, the designers had to create red carpet looks out of eco-friendly fabrics that they took turns choosing. Ivy selected a golden fabric and went for a look that was inspired by the sun, complete with rays and everything. She was nervous because she doesn't usually do maxi-length dresses and this design went to the floor, and she was additionally stressed because she was eliminated for not finishing her red carpet look in her own season. She hoped that history wouldn't repeat herself, but then it appeared to do just that. She had nothing to try on when the models came in for a fitting, and with just hours left on the second and final day, Ivy decided to shorten the dress after all. There was much Concern in the work room.

   It helps to draw eco-friendly designs in nature, I guess

On the runway, Isaac took the words right out of my mouth when he said that Ivy's dress was "the worst that that fabric has ever looked." Amen, brother. That thing was puckered and tortured within an inch of its overworked life. Ivy tried to explain that she's never done red carpet, and Isaac dismissed the excuse as irrelevant and nonsensical. I have never connected with The Mizrahi more. Georgina commented, "There's normally a lightness to your work, and this is so heavy." During deliberation, Isaac called the dress "miserably executed" but thought that Ivy's ideas came through. Guest judge Diane Von Furstenberg thought that Ivy simply couldn't handle the fabric because the design was "beautiful." Oh, girl. From one Dian(n)e to another, I am just not with you right now. Ivy unsurprisingly landed in the bottom two, but much to my personal shock, she was saved in the end. She'd better turn the next challenge OUT because she's on thin ice (with me).  

Kind of painful to look at, no?


Dianne Choie


Dianne Choie's TV is in Brooklyn, NY. She has a cat, several reusable shopping bags, and other mildly annoying stereotypes of youngish people who live in Brooklyn.